I wrote this to share with friends several years ago, and after recently trying to wean a couple of handfed baby hedgehogs onto dish feeding couldn't resist hunting it up to share.
Ingredients Needed: Five four week old baby hedgehogs, one small batch slightly thick formula, one baby food jar lid
Time needed: ten to fifteen minutes for preparation. Double that for clean up.
1. place baby food jar lid in enclosure on flat surface. Allow babies to explore lid.
2. place large squirt of formula in dish
3. watch and laugh hysterically as baby hedgehogs explore drinking from dish
4. whimper quietly as baby hedgehogs get themselves, each other, and most of cage COVERED in formula
5. remove individual babies to potty, feed with dropper, and clean off
6. whimper when just cleaned babies make beeline for dish
7. repeat steps four through six until ready to scream
8. remove individual babies to clean up, place in clean hedge bag on bed
9. whimper again when babies refuse to STAY in clean hedge bag while other babies get cleaned up
10. call child to watch babies
11. endure being laughed at by seven year old, who finds disasterized hedge babies and cage hilarious
12. threaten child who also finds this hilarious, but at least agrees to watch babies
13. explain to helpful dog that said dog does not need to be in charge of cleaning up baby hedgies
14. laugh when very weird dog insists on licking baby hedgehog anyway, making horrible faces the whole time, but refusing to stop washing it
15. finish cleaning remaining baby hedgies while dancing around to thwart insane licking dog who is still trying to help
16. remove ALL bedding from enclosure, wipe enclosure, put towel and hedge bag in wash, put in fresh towel
17. put babies back in hedge bag despite howls of four year old that they were playing with her
18. put hedge bag full of baby hedgies back in enclosure
19. close lid of enclosure with BIG sigh
20. chase down other 'helpful' dog who has made off with yummy baby food lid
21. go to wash baby food lid to find that a cat has knocked over container of formula you forgot to put back in fridge
22. call cat bad names while cleaning counter and making new formula
23. wonder why breeding hedgehogs seemed like such a good idea
24. repeat at four hour intervals
25. go share with friends so THEY can laugh too.